August 2025

The ecter symbol in black, depicted as two circular rings with a triangular chunk taken out from the top, and a diamond floating above it.ALT
The ecter symbol in white, depicted as two circular rings with a triangular chunk taken out from the top, and a diamond floating above it.ALT
The ecter symbol in black, depicted as two circular rings with a triangular chunk taken out from the top, and a diamond floating above it. This version has a rainbow gradient inside the outer ring's borders.ALT

Ecter Identity Masterpost

Ecters, originally coined with its alternative name Menre, was first created by me in 2022 here. Not all information about it on the original post is entirely accurate anymore, so an updated explanation is in order!

A page for ecter identity can be found on Neocities.

[1] What’s Ecter Identity?

Ecter Identity, also called Menre, refers to identities and identity systems that are outside the boundaries of “gender” entirely. It’s comparable to something like nonbinary is for the gender binary, except it is outside of gender itself. It’s a huge umbrella term that can contain countless identification systems and unique experiences, each one capable of being just as varied and expansive as gender is. Someone might have their own, standalone gender identity, or they might experience identity in a specific ecter system.

Ecter and gender aren’t a binary. Ecter is anything outside of gender and is a massive catch-all, not one single standalone experience / identity system.

This can be a really difficult concept to understand. It opens the door to the idea that gender itself can have a vast realm of identity outside of it, while still filling a somewhat similar niche. Some ecters might feel similar in concept to gender identity, while others might be entirely different in a variety of ways, with no similarities to how gender is perceived or experienced.

Ecter comes from ect- which means outside, and -er, the same ending as gender. Broadly, this translates to “outside [of] gender.” Menre, meanwhile, is taken from genre, and should be pronounced similarly (mahn-rah, not mehn-rey.) Ecter is intentionally meant to sound somewhat similar to gender, while menre is meant to be more general. Ecter can be used the same way gender is, conjugation-wise; ie, ecter identity, ecters, ectered, and so on.

[2] Ecter Systems

Ecter Systems refers to ecters within their own self-contained bubble, often with their own “rules,” identification, and experiences. They can be considered their own standalone equivalents to gender identity. If you made something called “Lender,” which is its own system of identification outside of gender, with its own set of identities and experiences… then it would be an ecter system.

The best way of understanding this is to imagine a separate society from humankind. They’re a species with their own equivalent identities that are different from gender. There’s a series of experiences commonly associated with these identities, and the way it works might be entirely different from gender identity. These individuals would have ecters; crucially, the term given to their specific identity system (let’s say they call it “milliah,” or something) would be an ecter system. So to put it another way, “ecter systems” refers to self-contained bubbles that are their own equivalent to “gender,” whereas “ecter” itself is the catch-all term for everything outside of gender identity, regardless of if it’s in a defined system or not.

Another way of thinking about it is galaxies. “Gender” is our Milky Way, and everything outside of it is “Ecter.” Different galaxies, like Andromeda, are ecter systems, having its own orbit and different star / planet / etc. systems. Some ecters, like rogue planets, float around freely in space, not tied to any galaxy at all.

Ecter identities do not need to be in an ecter system in order to exist; plenty of them can be on their own, independently and not in any kind of system, sort of like how some people just use “nonbinary” or “queer” without any further specification. 

Important to note that two ecter systems are usually just as separate from each other as ecters and genders, besides the fact that neither one is gender. No two ecters have to be alike, and ecter systems are not all universally connected to each other. Going back to the space analogy, being in one “galaxy” does not mean you’re connected to all the others. You can make ecter systems that are tied to each other, but unless explicitly stated, you should assume that they’re independent to themselves. 

This is a really simple way of visualizing it. As you can see, everything outside of the green circle / border would be considered ecters, but ecter systems are their own self-contained bubbles that are different equivalents to gender.

[3] Notes

Some examples of ecters that already exist are kenocter, cybecter, and ecterfluid, all of which I made myself. Any ecters I’ve seen or made can be found in this tag.

Ecter was partly made to describe nonhuman characters and species that I thought would have their own unique equivalents to gender, while existing completely outside of it. I also think it could be considered useful to a variety of nonhuman and alterhuman individuals, who might not subscribe to the concept of “gender identity” and experience something outside of those bounds. That being said, ecter was made as a concept for absolutely anybody to use.

If this still confuses you, you can always ask me about it directly and I’ll try to word it differently as many times as you need. :)

i cannot express to you enough that you literally do not have to get into a relationship. ever. you don’t have to get married. you don’t have to be dating. you don’t have to search for “the one.” you don’t have to have sex. you don’t have to deal with any of that shit if you don’t want to. even if you’re not aro or ace or anything. you can have attraction to people in any kind of way, and still not want to do some or any of it. it’s about what you want to devote your time to and what you find fulfilling or important, not “well people said i had to because that’s what they consider normal behavior.”

It sucks so much that it took years for me to figure my gender out, so many years never feeling fully satisfied calling myself anything, because of joint transphobia from cis people and misogyny + exorsexism from other trans people. Like, on one hand I had cis people try to force me to be feminine, pushed me into being A Woman in a way that made me so uncomfortable and dysphoric that I became extremely avoidant and negatively biased towards it, thought I had to be a man and only a man or otherwise I would have to be that same thing getting forced onto me. Then while I was growing up there were transmeds everywhere, I briefly was one after some adults pulled my 14 year old self into a Discord server from Tumblr because I was openly IDing as a demiboy. And obviously they, all together, were able to dismantle a younger teenagers half-baked arguments and understanding of Big Scary Words and they sounded smart, so I thought they must be right. Then being surrounded by misogyny, the constant discourse about queer women of this or that group, the right-wing and antifeminist memes of my teen years being everywhere, Gamergate, transmeds… it only made me feel both unhappy in my manhood because it was so focused on self-hate, but it also unknowingly made me internalize so much misogyny and basically made the idea of also being a woman sound like a horrible, awful thing. Not great when you’re both

But there’s a silver lining to it, from when I got pulled out of the transmed spiral into hell, that I still remember to this day. There was this trans guy on my bus who was just… the most radiant and incredibly positive person I’d ever met. He was always there for me when I was going through all that depression and moping around, no matter how ridiculous I thought I was being, he showed me happy music and patted my back and was just. Always a friend! And he barely even knew me! One day I find out two things. First of all, he didn’t have gender dysphoria. And it confused the hell out of me, because The Worms had taken over my brain and I thought, wait, what, aren’t those people [insert horrible stereotype here]? That shook me hard enough. But THEN, not long after I found out the guy- this positive, unconditionally kind guy who was seemingly friends with everyone- was getting bullied. By almost all the other trans people in my school, including ones I thought were nice. Purely for not having gender dysphoria. And I realized how fucked up my new “friends” twice my age really were and said fuck that, bye assholes! Shout out to Marco the best trans guy of all time.

About a year later, largely thanks to Marco, I was very open about being trans. I didn’t know I was nonbinary yet, but I was much more comfortable in my manhood and went by just a male name and pronouns despite not “passing” at all. And I met this person who at the time was IDing as a cis pan guy. We became REALLY good friends, I sometimes got asked kinda weird questions but I was open to it, I knew my friend’s parents were conservative and not everybody’s gonna know everything, though I did put my foot down [gently] a couple times when I needed to. I just existed, openly, around people. And just last year, I got an email from her. It turned out, she was a trans woman and she had no idea that was even an option for her. And what helped her figure it out? According to her, it was meeting me. Realizing it was an option, because I didn’t hide who I was in front of a supposedly cis person who was confused, but never mean, always tried. Hearing that was fucking life-changing

I think my point to all of this is like. Actually, being open about who you are is a good thing. I don’t think you should ever feel ashamed for being open about yourself and living confidently with it. You might not realize it, but you literally change people’s lives and make them realize that they don’t have to be miserable purely by existing openly. That being trans can bring you joy and happiness. Marco, purely by being nice to me and being open about his identity, pulled me out of a self-hating spiral that was built on harassing trans kids. I, purely by existing, helped a trans girl who didn’t even know what the hell a transgender person was, who didn’t always use the right language and who I openly talked to about being trans anyways, correcting but never shaming her for it, realize that she could be trans, too. Your open existence literally brightens people’s lives