there’s one thing i always think about that really shows other trans people do not think about how disproportionately trans women are targeted. and that’s the “accidentally gender-affirming bigot” joke.
this joke has been made by many, many trans men, transmascs, and other trans people who do not experience transmisogyny. it’s been made a lot because the interaction that sets it up happens all the time. it is the typical modus operandi for transphobes.
they will go on any page that they see has a trans person, and they will comment or otherwise say: “you’ll never be a real woman.”
and then, trans people who are not the target of this joke will get to have a laugh about it. because this is now an Accidentally Gender-Affirming Bigot! how funny! because of course i wasn’t trying to be a woman, and don’t you see how funny it is that this ignorant bigot got it so wrong?
and then it goes on existing as a funny joke about the Accidentally Gender-Affirming Bigot, except the trans people who are not the target of it don’t actually reflect on why someone would say this to them. they don’t think about the fact that the majority of transphobia explicitly targets trans women as fake women and predatory pretenders. the people who think the Accidentally Gender-Affirming Bigot is a funny display of ignorance don’t think about why it’s so funny to them that they were mistaken for and insulted as if they were one of the most vulnerable women in their community. they laugh about it and move on.
this same bigot will go on to say this about every trans woman they see online. these trans women do not get the fun of making an Epic Joke about it. and the bigot does not care that people who were mistakenly hit by that bigotry think it’s funny. the bigot cares about targeting trans women.